Shame To Be Poor?

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A Message from the Kalever Rebbe
for Parshas Shoftim 5780

THE TRUE BELIEVER DOES NOT WASTE MONEY ON LUXURIES, AND THEREBY IS WORTHY TO TRUE HAPPINESS

Corona wedding

A "Corona time wedding"

"And you shall not shed innocent blood in the midst of the Land which Hashem your God gives to you as an inheritance, and you would thereby bear the guilt of the blood" (Deuteronomy/Devarim 19:10)

A story is told of my holy ancestor, Rebbe Tzvi Hirsch of Ziditchov, zt"l, who was once the guest of a wealthy individual, who was a well-known philanthropist in the city of Lvov (Lemberg). In his home, he had a special china cabinet where he stored expensive silverware, and behind the utensils there was a mirror along the entire inner wall of the cabinet, which was then a new idea that became popular among wealthy people at that time.

When my holy grandfather walked through the cabinet, he gazed upon it, and it was obvious on his face that he had some sign of enjoyment. The wealthy man understood that the holy Rebbe was not impressed by materialism, thus he asked him what gave him enjoyment. My holy ancestor answered saying: "I am enjoying that I have found an answer for a question I had on a statement of our Sages".
He continued by explaining: "It is written in Midrash Rabbah (Koheles Rabbah 1:13), that 'a person never dies fulfilling half of his desires. If someone has 100, he wants 200'. I always had a question, if a person only desires to have twice of what he currently has, then he indeed has half of his desires, and he is only missing the rest, so why does it say he doesn't have half?"

"However, now I know the answer. I see that a mirror is placed behind the items in the cabinet; it is so people see it as if there is twice as much as there actually is. This even fools the owner to feel as if he has double, so if he has 10 utensils, he feels like he has 20. Since the nature of people is to desire double of what he feels that he has, he desires quadruple of what he actualy has, thus he finds that he really does not have half of his desires, but only a quarter!"

These words of my holy ancestor clearly express the situation we find in our time, not only with china cabinets, but all kinds of other things as well. People always want to show others as if they have twice of what they really have. For this reason they conduct their lives trying to show themselves as if they have double of what they actually have. They purchase items such as clothing and home wares that are too expensive for their means, and they begin to imagine that they are actually wealthier than they actually are. In truth, they are wasting their money and destroying their lives by running after money to pay their debts and to go on with this lifestyle.

This is true even more regarding weddings, where people spend more than necessary, and borrow money to have a wedding that is beyond their means, which is an unnecessary luxury; for example having the most expensive wedding hall and the most expensive foods, with abundant flowers and expensive clothing, and other things for materialistic beauty.

These causes the parents of the bride and groom to lack true joy in the wedding, but rather filled with worry how to pay their debts. This could cause a person to become ill with heartache, which can lead to heart disease, may Hashem save us.

All of this comes from a lack of faith, because if someone constantly reviews and remembers that everything he has in life is from God alone, he will know that it is no honor to be wealthy, and it is no shame to be poor. So, in the end, there is no reason to work hard to make himself look richer than he is.

Just as a person is not ashamed to have a limited body that Hashem created, as it is told a story (Avos D'Rebbe Nosson ch. 41) that a person who was insulted about his disability said to the insulter "go to the Designer Who made me". This is the same issue with the monetary limits God gives a person. If he is not successful in his efforts to make a living, he has no reason to be ashamed of this.

It is clear that wealth does not depend upon wisdom, effort, or alacrity, as we see there are wealthy people who are not wise and not hardworking, and there are many poor people who are wise and hardworking, as it is written "bread does not go to the wise, and wealth does not go to the understanding" (Ecclesiastes/Koheles 9:11).
Sometimes, there is a wealthy person who thinks that his success is because of his wisdom or his hard work. And likewise, there is a poor person who believes that he is not successful because he lacks wisdom or skill. But when these two meet together and speak to one another, they can see that the poor man is wiser and works harder, but it becomes apparent that Hashem is the One Who is really in control of what each person will have, whether he will be rich or poor. Concerning this, King Solomon said in his wisdom, "The wealthy and the poor meet together, Hashem made them all" (Proverbs/Mishlei 22:2).

A wealthy person who believes that all of his profit is decreed from Heaven, and that wealth is like an inheritance, thus he has no reason to be proud of his wealth, because it did not come from his effort, thus he will not waste his money on luxuries in order to feel proud through his money. Similarly, a poor person who is a believer will not be ashamed of his situation, and he will also limit his expenses in accordance with his means.

It is possible to say that this is hinted here in the verse. The Hebrew word "dam", which means "blood", can also be translated as "money", as our Sages used the term "double money is intended" (Megillah 14b), where the word for money is "dammim". According to this, we can explain the Scripture: "and you shall not spill clean 'dam' in the midst of your Land" to mean you should not waste money on unnecessary luxuries, because you know that all of your earthly good is "which Hashem your God gives you as a inheritance", and then "'vahoyu' = it will be" – which is a term of joy according to our tradition, which means you will be able to have true happiness and joy in life, "and the 'damim' will be upon you", you will keep both types of "dam", meaning you will be healthy and not suffer from heart disease that is connected to blood, and you will keep the "dam" of money.

Along these lines, we should learn a lesson from this time in history where our community is forced to have all of our special occasions such as weddings be conducted in a small and modest way, due to the epidemic, and we see that this is indeed successful and bring more true joy. May it be Hashem's Will that every individual and all of the congregations that are trying to remove the plague of wasting money on luxuries, will be worthy to see blessing in their good deeds.

***

COMING SOON!

rabeinu

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